Callie, the wonder cat, in our field.Per-Severance:
Summer has passed into Harvest Time. For me it has been a month of severance from almost everyone, including my own heart. My writing has seemingly languished. The big ideas of selling my new book have remained ideas, netting 24 sales (so far). My business plan is lost somewhere in a disheveled drawer. I ask my partner to communicate with me and then I become mute. I look for friendship and leave the phone off line.
Strange, the seasons of emotion... e-motion.
I wonder if I'm a quitter. Or has this been a time to recollect myself from a Summer of labor and growth? I ask God for an answer to these queries.
Then I look out my window and see a beautiful coyote in our field. She is gray and tan with thick fur and bright eyes. She appears to be searching for voles or mice in the dewy grass. And she runs on only three legs. Her front right leg is a stump, a painful relic of someone's trap or speeding car.
Who am I to quit? Who am I to second guess the paths of fate and consequence? The word Perseverance comes through the window and lands on the writing desk. Per- Severe... Per-Sever... to be willing to go on and do what you alone can do, to come out from the den and the shadows to hunt and play. Th
e crippling aspects of life, the very things one rails against, become the motivations to come into the light.The coyote sees me as I go out to watch and protect the chickens. She runs to the edge of the woodland. Perhaps she still observes me, wary, curious and determined to live the only life she can live.
Today I pray for two things:
For a vision of how to live and be creative in this harvest season.
Then for the strength to do what is necessary to bring in the all that I have sowed so early in the year.
I paraphrase my yoga teacher* who says that the purpose of a spiritual practice is to move through to the end of life without regret... even if the movement requires extraordinary balance and perseverance.
May the peace of discipline and determination be yours today.
May you smile upon the harvest that comes to you this season.
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*Yvonne at Shanti Yoga
thanks for sharing this...and please don't give up on selling your book....keep reminding us...my cash flow is in a crunch this month but next month I'd love to buy it...your poems are such an inspiration!...sending blessings your way for perseverance....Debora
ReplyDeleteA quote from Martha Graham. I keep this framed in my studio for those times of uncertainty when I feel what I am doing doesn't matter. But it does, and we need your voice, too. Your beauty. Keep the channel open!
ReplyDelete"There is a vitality, a life force, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and it will be lost. The world will not have it.
It is not your business to determine how good it is, nor how valuable it is; nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours, clearly and directly, to keep the channel open. You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep open and aware directly to the urges that motivate you.
Keep the channel open. No artist is pleased. There is no satisfaction whatever at any time. There is only a queer, divine dissatisfaction, a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than the others.”